Because these things need to be shown off, rather than just talked about...

[nothinglikeabee]

[Notes: This was a log from the long-defunct game Flamingo U, in which I played Waspinator and my friend Pocky played Inferno. This was the first time in the game that non-humans turned humans.

...And can you tell that we ship it?]

To say Waspinator was freaking out was putting it lightly.

Even though Inferno had told him to calm down and he'd tried his best to do so, this whole thing was making him panicky. What if they were stuck like this forever? What would he do with himself? It was horrible and how was Inferno so calm about it?!

Waspinator was in such a hurry to find Inferno and make sure things really would be okay that he just threw on any old clothes from the lost and found, resulting in the world's ugliest outfit. Not that it would have mattered anyway; he had no clue about how to dress. The pants were entirely too long, in any case, and he was tripping over them as he scurried to the dining hall in search of the other robot-turned-human.

Spotting an unfamiliar-looking naked man seated at one of the tables, Waspinator changed directions, nearly crashing into the table because of the too-long pants. "Infeeeerno..." His voice had the same whiny, buzzy quality to it, which was made much worse by his panic over the situation.

"...Waspinator?!" Inferno sprang dramatically to his feet at the familiar voice emanating from the unfamiliar form, knocking over his chair and flashing the entirety of the dining hall in the process. All modesty aside, humanity and nudity were not enough to put a dent in the former ant-bot's penchant for flamboyant gestures. "Did you bring the clothing?"

Waspinator looked at him and turned about a million shades of red. Naked people -like the one with the big nose who'd been nude for an entire WEEK after he'd arrived- scared him. "Yezzz..." He buzzed, thrusting a wad of clothing at the taller man and turning his head away. "Pleazzze put them on."

"With pleasure," Inferno enthused, snatching the somewhat mismatched outfit out of Waspinator's hand. He spent a few minutes fumbling with the various buttons and zippers, all the while cursing the complexity of human clothing under his breath, until he finally ended up properly clothed in the ill-fitting pair of jeans and unfortunately colored yet strangely attractive pink bowling shirt, aptly labeled "BAD MAN." He let out a soft sigh of relief, now feeling much more comfortable in his current surroundings, and righted his chair. He opted not to sit back down, however, due to the massive bruise his rear end had sustained in his fall from the heavens earlier that day. Humans certainly had an interesting way of processing damage...this hurt like hell.

Waspinator fidgeted nervously, shuffling his bare feet and sliding a little, due to the length of the hideous plaid pants he was wearing. "What we do now?" His hands were twisted in the hem of the ratty orange shirt he was wearing, picking at a pre-existing hole and making it larger. He had calmed down considerably, but he was still twitchy. If Inferno didn't know what to do until they were normal again...He was on the verge of another freak-out just thinking of the possibilities.

Inferno turned his unnaturally red eyes toward his now human comrade and looked him over. "You look ridiculous," he said scornfully. He sat back down, wincing slightly as he did so, and pressed his fingertips together as he considered the options. "We are, for the moment, organic. It would be wisest to behave as the organics do. Fortunately, we already have access to sustinance, as this colony happens to be a human dining facility. But we will require a safe place to power down at night. And, with any luck, better clothes."

"Wazzpinator can't help how Wazzpinator lookz!" With a little 'humph' sound, the former insect folded his arms, turning up his nose. He certainly felt ridiculous; human bodies were so awkward! But what else was there to do? "Wazzpinator hazzzz clozzet. Izz safe, but small. Not enough room for both of uzzzz..."

Inferno facepalmed, startlingly comfortable in his human skin. "You have lived among humans longer than I, and you have learned nothing? Humans do not sleep in their closets, fool! They sleep in beds. Unless you have one in your closet, it will be insufficient."

Waspinator blushed again, anger at how Inferno always managed to make him feel stupid outweighing the paranoia and fear about being human. "Wazpinator not have anywhere elzzze to go." He muttered, "Triangle Man juzzzt say that iz Wazpinator'zzz clozet, so that izz where Wazpinator stay."

"Unfortunately, I do not have suitable accomadations either," Inferno mused. Suddenly, he sprang to his feet again, one arm shooting into the air and pointing toward the ceiling. "Come! We will search together!"

"If Inferno thinkz izzz good idea..." Waspinator ran a hand through his hair in an unconscious gesture of pure nerves. He really wanted nothing more than to shut himself up in the janitor's closet until this was over, but suspected that either wasn't a good idea or Inferno would drag him back out, anyway.

Satisfied with that answer, Inferno seized Waspinator by the hand and marched out the door, dragging him along behind. There were few things he enjoyed more than having a mission. "I have been observing the humans since I got here," he chattered. "And I believe there are structures intended for exactly this purpose. A...temporary colony, if you will."

The smaller of the two found he had no other choice but to follow as he was dragged along, hurrying to keep up with Inferno's longer stride. "What Inferno talking about?" He questioned. He'd been happily oblivious to most things about the humans up to this point and was regretting it now that he was stuck living as one.

"There!" Inferno pointed with a flourish to the nearby hotel. "This is where the other humans go when they are in need of temporary accommodations. We shall spend the night there and re-evaluate our situation in the morning."

Waspinator cocked his head, taking in the building and it's flashing neon "vacancy" sign. The place looked safe...And better than his closet, in any case. It was bound to have bigger rooms, at least. "Okay..." He nodded in agreement, clearly waiting for Inferno to take the lead. Waspinator had never been a leader and he was very lost in all of this.

Without hesitation, Inferno dragged Waspinator into the hotel lobby and declared to the man behind the counter that they required a room. The unfazed employee - who by now believed he had seen it all - took one look at Inferno's hand latched onto Waspinator's wrist and selected a key to a room with a single queen-sized bed. There certainly were a lot of homosexuals in this town. "That'll be sixty-five dollars," he said calmly. Inferno stared blankly at him.

Waspinator, for once, knew what was going on. He'd been getting paid for his work around campus, though he'd not found any use for the money. Unfortunatly, all of that money was in the form of uncashed paychecks in his closet. "Man wantzz human money, Inferno." He said matter-of-factly, "Humanz uzzze money to get thingz they want."

"Well, where the devil do we get that?" Inferno huffed, folding his arms and trying to cover for the fact that he felt profoundly stupid.

"Inferno doezzn't get paid for job? Wazpinator doez..." Waspinator looked up at the taller man, hands in his pockets, "Not really need money, though...Juzzzt leave it in the clozet."

"What do you mean by 'job?'" Inferno demanded. "If you are referring to the protection of the colony, why should I recieve meaningless compensation for fulfilling my life's purpose? Now, come! We will get this 'money' from your closet and return to claim our room!"

"Fine." Waspinator repressed the urge to roll his eyes at Inferno's little speech and turned to head back to the college. He wasn't sure how to go about using human money, but he had it and that was a start. "Letz go then...Wazpinator will get money."

Inferno gestured for Waspinator to lead them on and marched after him. Being a human was certainly turning out to be both confusing and disconcerting, but he wasn't about to let that on. He was the type to project an air of confidence in everything he did...even when he was completely clueless.

It didn't take long to get back. Waspinator's closet was cluttered and full of stuff; all kinds of cleaning supplies he never touched, bits of the dining hall, things he found laying around...Somewhere in the mess there was a stack of paychecks he'd not known what to do with. He dug around, rooting for the slips of paper among the clutter and making a triumphant sound when he found one. "Ah ha!" He waved the little paper in Inferno's face. "Thizz izz what Wazpinator get for hizzz hard work."

"What does it do?" Inferno scowled, poking at the slip of paper as if he was expecting it to do a trick. "Never mind, it is unimportant. As long as it is sufficient to procure our room."

"It getz thingz for us..." Waspinator carefully picked his way back out of the mess that was his closet and shut the door before any of his things could escape. "We can get place to power down now...That'z what it doezzz."

"Very well," Inferno said impatiently. "And you are certain that nothing else needs to be done before we return to the hotel?"

"Wazzpinator not think zzzzo..." Waspinator scratched his head, looking at the piece of paper. "No one tell Wazzpinator what to do with it. Guezzz we find out."

"Yes...I suppose so." There was a bit less enthusiasm and a bit more frustration in Inferno's march as they returned to the hotel. And he was about ready to burn the building down after the man at the desk politely informed them that checks needed to be cashed. Fortunately, perhaps because he sensed that his life was in danger if he didn't, the man simply showed Waspinator how to sign the check over and handed them their keys, hoping that he wouldn't be on shift the next time these two weirdos needed something.

Having never really written anything down in his life, Waspinator took his sweet time in signing the check. As it was, his signature was merely a scribble with some recognizable letters, but apparently that was good enough. He smiled and gave his companion a "See? I told you that would work!" look as the bewildered desk clerk handed the keys to Inferno.

Inferno merely made a "Hmph" sound in reply, snatched the keys, and stormed off. On finding their room, he opened the door and stalked through it cautiously, taking stock of his surroundings. He peeked into the closet, turned the TV on and just as quickly turned it off again, and finally took a very hesitant seat on the edge of the single, large bed. It was soft, certainly not unpleasant, but...something about this situation gnawed at his newly human instincts as being slightly wrong. Wasn't there some expression about sleeping with someone else? If only he could remember what it meant...

Waspinator paused in the doorway, watching Inferno inspect the place. Then he padded in, nearly tripping over his pants once more. "Thizz iz bigger than clozet...Nicer smell, too." The little bit of time he'd spent in the closet as a human had left him light-headed from all the chemicals. "Thiz iz what Inferno had in mind?" Something about the expression on Inferno's face left him thinking perhaps this wasn't going as planned.

"There is...something unsettling about the bed," Inferno said, his eyes narrowed to suspicious slits. "I am not certain why, but I feel as though it is not right for us to share it."

Waspinator shrugged, flopping down on the other side of the bed and staring up at the ceiling. "Seemz nice enough to Wazzpinator..." He suddenly felt very tired. Being human was hard work! As a robot, daily activities took much less energy.

Inferno reluctantly laid back on the bed as well, wishing he could remember just what it was that usually occurred when two humans shared a bed. Heaven knows they talked about it often enough...but he was still sore from falling out of the sky earlier and the fatigue of an extremely trying day was clouding his mind. He crawled under the blankets in an effort to get settled. His clothes were uncomfortable and he had the distinct feeling that they were not meant to be slept in, but that situation would have to wait until morning to be rectified. "I am going to power down," he said brusquely, curling up as far away from Waspinator as possible.

"Okay..." Waspinator rolled over, distracted by inspecting a somewhat flat pillow encased in a crisp, horribly patterned pillowcase. He smiled a little, not even bothering to go under the blankets, and scrunched up in a corner of the bed. This was definitely better than sleeping in the closet.

Despite wearing inappropriate clothing and feeling a bit chilled even under the blankets, it was not long before Inferno fell into a deep but uneasy sleep. He woke up a few hours later and started with the realization that something had grabbed onto his arm as he slept. Much to his dismay, he quickly realized that that something happened to be a sleeping and very contented-looking Waspinator.

Waspinator had indeed shifted positions while sleeping and was then latched on to Inferno's arm. It wasn't often that he was this close to any one and it was even more rare that the others he was around tolerated him as well as Inferno. Something about this left his subconscious craving more contact and he'd curled against the larger man in his sleep, oblivious to any discomfort it could have caused Inferno. He was warm, he was happy and he was getting more rest than he ever could have as a robot. Yeah, life was pretty damn good for Waspinator.

Inferno, meanwhile, was very quietly freaking out. This was wrong, wrong, wrong! Waspinator should not be...cuddling with him! He attempted to pry the smaller man off of him, but Waspinator had a surprisingly strong grip. That, and...the physical contact was surprisingly pleasant.

Though he was clearly not awake, Waspinator frowned at Inferno's attempt to detach himself, latching on tighter and trying to keep his "pillow" from moving. He had been quite comfortable and didn't want that to change.

Realizing he was stuck, Inferno heaved a resigned sigh and flopped back down onto his pillow. He knew he wouldn't be getting back to sleep easily in this predicament, and his current position left him no option but to look at Waspinator. He found himself studying his comrade's human features as his mind wandered. In this form, he mused, Waspinator looked very young...unsurprising, considering how immature and whiny the other bot could be at times. But asleep, with his hair tousled and a little smile on his face, he looked very little like that simpering and obnoxious creature. He looked...innocent. Peaceful. And genuinely happy, which was an extremely rare thing as far as Waspinator was concerned.

Almost unconsciously, Inferno reached his free hand out to pat Waspinator on the head.

At the touch, Waspinator smiled a little, making a content sound. He didn't know it, but he'd been starved for affection his entire life. It wasn't easy being Waspinator; hardly any one liked him, he was damaged on a regular basis, and got the short end of the stick more often than not. It was a bit odd that he was suddenly getting more positive attention; he was still just as defective and annoying as always, even in this body. Really, none of it made sense, but he was asleep, and things such of these were the furthest things from his mind.

The little sound was enough to jolt Inferno's mind into realizing what he was doing and he recoiled, yanking the hand away with an expression of pure horror on his face. What the hell was he doing?! Not only had he never felt any desire to be affectionate to anyone before, this was Waspinator. Useless, whiny, lazy, traitorous Waspinator! Inferno wondered if he was going insane.

At the disturbance, Waspinator slit his eyes open, frowning through the darkness at Inferno. He was lazy and didn't like being woken before he was ready.

Now thoroughly flustered, Inferno actually blushed as he wrenched his other arm from Waspinator's grasp. "Just what do you think you're doing?" he snapped.

"Wazpinator wazzz...sleeping," The smaller man replied, tone conveying his clear annoyance at having been disturbed, "until Inferno moved."

"Of course I moved," Inferno huffed, folding his arms and lifting his chin defiantly. "I did not give you permission to touch me!"

"Did not know permizzzion waz required..." Waspinator made a face, turning his back on Inferno. He didn't quite get what the big deal was. It had been comfortable. What else was there to it?

"Just stay at your end of the bed," Inferno snapped, burrowing further under the blankets. "And keep your hands to yourself."

"Sorry..." Ah, this was more like it. Much more like it. It wasn't an average day if some one wasn't snapping at Waspinator over something or other. The brief moment of happiness was over and things were back to normal. Waspinator scooted back over to the very edge of the bed, curling up in a little ball.

Inferno followed suit, bunching himself up in the opposite corner. He was cold again. Having Waspinator next to him, he had been warm, at least...come to think of it, the physical contact had actually been rather pleasant. Comfortable, even. But no, the idea was still repellant and he wasn't about to renege on his order and appear soft in his comrade's eyes. So he huddled in on himself as best he could and tried to go back to sleep.

Though he was annoyed and confused and a little bit hurt even, it didn't take Waspinator long to fall back to sleep. And, sure enough, it wasn't long until he had rolled over, sprawled all over the bed in an effort to get cozy, then curled back up against Inferno again.

Half awake, Inferno noticed when Waspinator wormed his way back across the bed and re-attached himself. He allowed it, justifying to himself that he was simply too tired for another argument. So, for now, he would just have to deal with it.